Belize Bloopers! The Sh*T We Should’ve Shown!

I’m just gonna keep it real with you. During most of my travels, for every perfectly captured image is an equally hilarious or even embarrassing story behind it. Add crazy friends into the mix and things seem to go even more haywire! I thought it would be cool to let you guys in on what really happens behind the scenes.  I present to you, “Belize Bloopers! The Sh*t We Should’ve Shown!” (I stole that line from MTV lol)

Day 1.

Yes, the shenanigans seriously start on day 1!

We make it to San Pedro and head into the BTL store so that I can purchase a local sim card for my iPhone. As I sit in the chair chatting with the customer service lady, I keep touching the back of my hair because I feel like this one piece is hanging extra long.  I call my friend Kelly over to check out the hair scene.  Her response: “Yeah, there’s something going on there.”

I realize that one of my crochet curls has come loose and is in danger of falling out (I know, my wording is dramatic).  I tell Kelly to discreetly rip it out.  She stands behind me and tries but it won’t budge.  I’m whisper yelling at her to “rip it out” and she’s yelling at me to take my hands off of it and “LET IT GO!”.  We are laughing and panicking and the guard behind us is trying to maintain his stone face and not laugh but even he couldn’t hold it. Finally, the customer service rep never says a word and just hands Kelly a pair of scissors.  Kelly cuts the curl off and stashes it in her purse and we are laughing hysterically.

The guard’s face is red. We politely hand the scissors back.

I lie to you not.

Belize Bloopers! The Sh*t We Should've Shown!, Bloopers

 

Golf Carts

Ok, so golf carts are the main mode of transportation in the Cayes. I knew that… but no one told me the roads were so bumpy! Seriously, I should have worn a tighter sports bra.  My boobs were flying all over the place!

Belize Bloopers! The Sh*t We Should've Shown!

I'm just gonna keep it real with you. When you see social media posts from travelers like myself lounging in a hammock or standup paddle boarding in the crystal clear waters of Ambergris Caye, it's easy to think that it's all just so glamorous. I'll let you in on a secret... It's not!
Too Much in the Suitcase

It’s one thing to neatly pack all of your clothes and accessories into your suitcase when you’re headed out for a vacation. You wear your heaviest items on the plane right? But once you start trying to put stuff back in there it’s another story.  Then instead of helping, your friend grabs the camera to get footage of the struggle!

Belize Bloopers! The Sh*t We Should've Shown!

Paddle-boarding & Floating

I have to say, the pics came out great.  What you didn’t see was me trying to get on that sucker!  Straddling it and flopping over into the water… in front of strangers.  Embarrassing.

Belize Bloopers! The Sh*t We Should've Shown!
What you saw.
Belize Bloopers! The Sh*t We Should've Shown!
What you didn’t see.
The Blue Hole

When you’re determined to snorkel the blue hole but end up having to be rescued by a kid cause you can’t swim (and you’re wearing a life vest). I’m not judging though.

Belize Bloopers! The Sh*t We Should've Shown!

Pontoon Day

When you had an epic day but you are just BEAT DOWN.

Belize Bloopers! The Sh*t We Should've Shown!

Belize Bloopers! The Sh*t We Should've Shown!
Sometimes you just need a nap.
Where Am I?

When your tour guide and friend play a mean trick on you.  You’re trying to nap on the ride back after a long day in the jungle and the guide slams on the breaks and screams.  You jump up out of your sleep and have no idea where you are or what’s going on!

I”m so mad that we didn’t think to snap a picture.  It sounds terrible but it was seriously the funniest thing ever. I still can’t stop laughing about it.

Disappeared (on I.D.)

Who leaves at 5 a.m. for a tour and walks down the street into the night?! Grab the butcher knife!

Belize Bloopers! The Sh*t We Should've Shown!

Nighttime Wildlife

When you jump out of bed in the middle of the night and say you felt something moving.  Your friend says “Like what, a bug?” and you say “No an animal!”

Friend ignores you and goes back to sleep.

You get back in the bed and go back to sleep.

LOL, I swear I felt something strange.

When Your Airbnb isn’t All That.

For the first time, I was disappointed in an Airbnb.  No fancy pictures of this place!

Belize Bloopers! The Sh*t We Should've Shown!

Water Taxi Hostage

When some very rowdy locals get on the water taxi and your friend has a wild imagination. She thinks they are pirates who are gonna take over the boat and make everyone “walk the plank” before off’ing us.

Belize Bloopers! The Sh*t We Should've Shown!
Pirate suspects not shown.
Gas Anyone?

When you ride around town on your golf cart and tire yourself out because you can’t find the one gas station in town.

Belize Bloopers! The Sh*t We Should've Shown!
Quit playing. Someone please show me where to get gas for this thing.
Yoga On The Water

When you realize you’re not as good at yoga as you thought but you decide it doesn’t matter cause your doing it in a cool location.

Belize Bloopers! The Sh*t We Should've Shown!
Who cares about form?
Don’t Make Me Do My Job

When the bartender gets mad every time someone orders a fruit smoothie.

Boy Bye

When a local declares that he needs to get something off of his chest and tells you that he wants to be your lover… and he has no front teeth and is dead serious.  Just stop.

I actually do have a picture but I’m not that mean!

A Kind of Shady Area

When you put the couch in front of the door to your Airbnb!

Belize Bloopers! The Sh*t We Should've Shown!
I mean… you win some, you lose some.
Why Pedal?

When a local just holds onto the back of your golf cart and goes along for the ride cause he doesn’t feel like pedaling his bike.

Hey, do you boo.

When your taxi driver is CRAY!

Fail.

When you’re brave enough to rope swing from a cliff into the water but your landing isn’t cute and you rip the skin off your finger! (Picture coming)

Caves and Holes

Climbing into holes in a cave is not pretty!! I literally almost cried when I couldn’t get out of one but here’s the pic YOU saw.

Belize Bloopers! The Sh*t We Should've Shown!

Broken A**

When your butt hurts and you can’t sit down on the toilet later cause you’ve been horseback riding ALL DAY.

Belize Bloopers! The Sh*t We Should've Shown!
“Maybe if I just sit to the side a little…” LOL
Security!

When you’re so tired that you leave the key to your room in the door and proceed to go to bed… Security knocks to let you know that you forgot something!

It Happens

When you’re deep in the jungle and have to cop a squat in the wilderness. Don’t judge.

Ornery Animals

When your horse keeps getting into fights with the other horse!

Belize Bloopers! The Sh*t We Should've Shown!
He was such a bad little booger.
Do What You Gotta Do

When you’re so tired from horseback riding that you just get off and walk the horse!

And finally… 

When you’re at the airport headed home and see the future version of yourself (in 30 years), mismatched from head to toe with a fannie pack and some fly sunglasses on…  traveling and LIVING LIFE!

You sneak a picture of her and smile.

Happy Travels my friends!

Winter (& Kelly)

This Life of Mine Blog

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

2 Comments

  • Reply Lisa j c Coleman April 3, 2017 at 10:08 am

    Hilarious thanks for sharing
    Love your posts & pictures you really show a girl how to enjoy life.

    • Reply Winter April 3, 2017 at 11:58 am

      Lisa, it’s always fun but crazy lol. Thank you for reading!

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